God Tells Me

God tells me that when He created the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil, He originally thought to call it the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Kinda Bad but realized that “kinda bad” spelled backward was “dabadnik”, which in Lithuanian means “transmission repair”, and wasn’t as cool as the “evil"/“live” thing.

God Tells Me

God tells me that when he decided to create humans he originally considered a one-leg design, but changed his mind when he realized that people praying to him on bended knee would fall over a lot.

God Says

God shined His light down on me just now and spoke to me and said that originally He considered making left down and right up, but decided against it because He thought it might be too confusing for everybody.